Considering a Collaborative divorce? Three questions to ask yourself.

Collaborative divorce may be good option for couples hoping to maintain a positive relationship after the divorce, who have the financial resources to pay for multiple divorce professionals, and who are willing to negotiate the divorce in good faith.

Divorce is a process that culminates when legal documents are filed with, and accepted by, the court. There are several different legal routes a couple can take to get from the beginning of a divorce (“we’ve decided to end our marriage”) to the final legal paperwork. One option is a process known as Collaborative divorce.

What is Collaborative divorce?

Collaborative divorce, also sometimes referred to as “Collaborative law” and “Collaborative practice,” refers to a specific divorce process and should not be confused with a divorce in which both spouses are working together in a way that is “collaborative” (i.e., lower case “c”). In a Collaborative divorce, each spouse has a Collaboratively trained family law attorney, which means the attorney has received advanced training in alternative dispute resolution, mediation, and facilitation. Collaborative divorces lack the “us versus them” dynamic typical in other divorce processes; instead, the two spouses and two attorneys work together to solve the problem of divorce.

What is the Participation Agreement?

At the start of working together, the spouses and attorneys sign a document known as the Participation Agreement. A hallmark of the Collaborative divorce process, the Participation Agreement commits all participants in the process to negotiating in a way that is respectful, transparent, and in good faith. In addition, both spouses agree to voluntarily disclose all facts and information that may be relevant to the divorce.

After the Participation Agreement is signed, spouses will work through the issues in their divorce with the assistance of the Collaborative team, which usually includes the two attorneys, a financial neutral, and a divorce coach. Through a series of two-hour meetings with the six members of the Collaborative “team,” the couple will work through the issues in the divorce in hopes of achieving a durable divorce settlement.

Wondering if Collaborative divorce could be a good fit for your situation? Be sure to ask yourself these three questions:

(1.) When the divorce is complete, what do I want my relationship to be like with my former spouse?

Collaborative divorce can be a great option for couples hoping to minimize the emotional damage that other “us versus them” divorce processes can inflict. In particular, Collaborative divorce can be a good fit for parents hoping to preserve and foster a healthy co-parenting relationship. Collaborative divorce generally entails working with a divorce coach, or mental health professional who specializes in working with divorcing couples. The spouses will have sessions with the coach to improve their communication, iron out co-parenting issues, and develop the parenting plan. When the entire Collaborative team has meetings, the coach helps to manage the emotional aspects of the meeting.

(2.) Can I afford to pay multiple divorce professionals?

Collaborative divorces usually entail several meetings with many professionals. In addition to the two-hour team meetings with the two spouses and four professionals, each spouse will have periodic one-on-one consultations with his or her own attorney. The spouses will also have one or more meetings with the financial neutral and divorce coach.

Considering the cost of all these professionals, a Collaborative divorce can easily cost $15,000 or more in professional fees.

(3) Can I trust my spouse to be transparent and to negotiate in good faith?

If you think your spouse is hiding money, Collaborative divorce may not be a good fit. Collaborative divorce is best for spouses committed to being honest and transparent in the divorce process. While other divorce processes may utilize a legal process known as discovery to legally require individuals to provide financial and other information, Collaborative divorce relies on the good faith of both spouses to fully disclose information.

Contact Serene Divorce Planning to learn more about Collaborative divorce and whether this divorce process might be a good fit for your situation.

This information is educational in nature and should not be relied upon for legal or tax advice. Serene Divorce Planning LLC is not an attorney and does not provide legal or tax advice. Individuals seeking legal or tax advice should solicit the counsel of competent legal or tax professionals knowledgeable about the divorce laws in their own geographical areas. Serene Divorce Planning LLC does not sell or consult on securities.